6/20 - Father's Day
I told my parents today! I was literally shaking when I told my dad and you know what he said? "Congratulations!" He seemed excited and supportive about the whole thing. I was sooo relieved! My mom, on the otherhand, didn't take it too well. Well, I guess it's not that she didn't take it well she was pretty much devoid of all emotion. She said it was "cool". Everyone handles big news in different ways, so maybe she'll get more excited about it later on. I'm not letting her rain on my parade. OK, that's all. Good night!
Sunday, June 20, 2010
Saturday, June 19, 2010
How Will My Parents React???
June 19th -
Originally, we had planned to tell my parents after we'd gotten engaged. We invited my dad out to Atlanta at the end of July so he can meet Scott and I kind of figured we tell him then. However, I have been giving it a lot of thought over the past couple days and I just can't keep it from them any longer. Also, giving my folks one month notice that we're getting married just doesn't seem fair. I think my dad will appreciate knowing earlier, too, because he likes to feel like he's part of all the decisions. I'm sure he'll want to weigh in on moving, wedding, etc. Additionally, if he doesn't take things too well, he'll have a couple months to get settled down. So things can only go one of two ways. If they don't support our decision then it's going to be their loss. This baby is coming either way. And I can't be focused on making them happy about our decision, I have to focus of keeping my stress level down and growing a happy baby. I am nervous, but I have a feeling they are going to be ok with it...and grow to be happy about it. I figure I'll tell him I should have gotten him a shotgun for Father's Day. Scott was going to wait to tell his mom and sister, too, but I think they already know. He keeps planting the "what if Dad wants to marry Melissa and have more kids" seed with the kids and they say things to his mom and sister. I guess they've asked him about whether I'm pregnant and he says, "I don't know". Yeah, they know. So I think he's going to officially tell them when he's on vacation at the beach in July. I'm excited for everyone to know...I'm kind of over the hiding it. Plus, I don't think I'm going to be able to hide it much longer!
We will see...
Originally, we had planned to tell my parents after we'd gotten engaged. We invited my dad out to Atlanta at the end of July so he can meet Scott and I kind of figured we tell him then. However, I have been giving it a lot of thought over the past couple days and I just can't keep it from them any longer. Also, giving my folks one month notice that we're getting married just doesn't seem fair. I think my dad will appreciate knowing earlier, too, because he likes to feel like he's part of all the decisions. I'm sure he'll want to weigh in on moving, wedding, etc. Additionally, if he doesn't take things too well, he'll have a couple months to get settled down. So things can only go one of two ways. If they don't support our decision then it's going to be their loss. This baby is coming either way. And I can't be focused on making them happy about our decision, I have to focus of keeping my stress level down and growing a happy baby. I am nervous, but I have a feeling they are going to be ok with it...and grow to be happy about it. I figure I'll tell him I should have gotten him a shotgun for Father's Day. Scott was going to wait to tell his mom and sister, too, but I think they already know. He keeps planting the "what if Dad wants to marry Melissa and have more kids" seed with the kids and they say things to his mom and sister. I guess they've asked him about whether I'm pregnant and he says, "I don't know". Yeah, they know. So I think he's going to officially tell them when he's on vacation at the beach in July. I'm excited for everyone to know...I'm kind of over the hiding it. Plus, I don't think I'm going to be able to hide it much longer!
We will see...
Friday, June 18, 2010
Work Distraction, Getting Sick, and A Quiet Baby
Work has been a constant worry for me lately and it's really affecting my performance. I think I am so overwhelmed that I can't do anything! I am having trouble leaving all my worries at the office door. I know I can do it. I have before. I just need to find that focus again. Luckily, I think I'm going to move back to the front room next to Rachael. The negativity in the back is really starting to wear on me, too. I am going to get the house all picked up this weekend and I think that will help with the stress. I am going to make a nice big To Do list.
I am showing really early!! I had to buy some maternity clothes the other day. Why didn't anyone tell me how comfortable maternity pants are?? They are like the mullet of pants...party on the top, business on the bottom. Rachael said to me today, "I can't believe how big you are already!". Scott thinks it's because he's so big, but I'm pretty sure it's because I had flabby abs before I got pregnant so their wasn't much holding back any pooch from showing. I don't mind, I just need to tell everyone else at work so I can stop sucking it in!
I've been sick the past few days, which has not really been all that much fun since I can't take any medicine to make me feel better (Sudafed and Tylenol don't do anything). I hope I get better before Scott gets here! I wonder if part of it is allergies...maybe the old feather bed? I'm going to watch all my sheets and vaccuum really well this weekend to see if that helps. Yesterday and this morning when I sneezed or coughed, I got this stabbing pain in my lower abdomen. I asked the doctor about it this morning and they said as long as it goes away in a few seconds and their is no bleeding, I should be fine. They were really great, though. They said I could come in for an exam if I felt uncomfortable. I do like that about that practice.
You know, for someone who has a tendancy to get all worked up about things completely out of my control, I think I've been pretty calm with my pregnancy. Of course there are a lot of things I can control with the pregnancy (ie - not drinking, etc) but so much of it is out of my control and I'm fine with that! God has a plan...whatever it may be...and I'm just going with it at this point. This whole "letting go and having faith" thing has been working out pretty well the past few months. The baby (I know, I know...it's only a fetus. Officially as of yesterday. Happy Fetushood!) has been so quiet lately. And by quiet, I really mean I feel great! Well except for having a cold, but that doesn't count. I have a normal amount of energy, no more crazy gas, my boobs aren't as sore as usual. As much as that's awesome, it of course makes me wonder if everything is ok with baby. Maybe I'm just getting used to the sore breasts. I still feel like I have a heavy belly and I can almost always feel something going on down there, so I guess that's good. I think my mom had a really easy pregnancy, too. I could ask her, but I of course still haven't told them yet. I feel like I should tell them in person, but that's just going to be difficult. I guess I can tell my dad when he comes to ATL in July, but I almost feel like that doesn't give him a lot of time to plan before the mini-wedding.
Well, I think I'm going to force myself to drink some more water and then try to go to bed. Good night!!
I am showing really early!! I had to buy some maternity clothes the other day. Why didn't anyone tell me how comfortable maternity pants are?? They are like the mullet of pants...party on the top, business on the bottom. Rachael said to me today, "I can't believe how big you are already!". Scott thinks it's because he's so big, but I'm pretty sure it's because I had flabby abs before I got pregnant so their wasn't much holding back any pooch from showing. I don't mind, I just need to tell everyone else at work so I can stop sucking it in!
I've been sick the past few days, which has not really been all that much fun since I can't take any medicine to make me feel better (Sudafed and Tylenol don't do anything). I hope I get better before Scott gets here! I wonder if part of it is allergies...maybe the old feather bed? I'm going to watch all my sheets and vaccuum really well this weekend to see if that helps. Yesterday and this morning when I sneezed or coughed, I got this stabbing pain in my lower abdomen. I asked the doctor about it this morning and they said as long as it goes away in a few seconds and their is no bleeding, I should be fine. They were really great, though. They said I could come in for an exam if I felt uncomfortable. I do like that about that practice.
You know, for someone who has a tendancy to get all worked up about things completely out of my control, I think I've been pretty calm with my pregnancy. Of course there are a lot of things I can control with the pregnancy (ie - not drinking, etc) but so much of it is out of my control and I'm fine with that! God has a plan...whatever it may be...and I'm just going with it at this point. This whole "letting go and having faith" thing has been working out pretty well the past few months. The baby (I know, I know...it's only a fetus. Officially as of yesterday. Happy Fetushood!) has been so quiet lately. And by quiet, I really mean I feel great! Well except for having a cold, but that doesn't count. I have a normal amount of energy, no more crazy gas, my boobs aren't as sore as usual. As much as that's awesome, it of course makes me wonder if everything is ok with baby. Maybe I'm just getting used to the sore breasts. I still feel like I have a heavy belly and I can almost always feel something going on down there, so I guess that's good. I think my mom had a really easy pregnancy, too. I could ask her, but I of course still haven't told them yet. I feel like I should tell them in person, but that's just going to be difficult. I guess I can tell my dad when he comes to ATL in July, but I almost feel like that doesn't give him a lot of time to plan before the mini-wedding.
Well, I think I'm going to force myself to drink some more water and then try to go to bed. Good night!!
Surprise!
6/13/2010 - about 9 1/2 weeks (baby 7 1/2 weeks)
It's been about 2 1/2 weeks since I found out I am pregnant, but it's felt like the longest 2 1/2 weeks ever! I go from feeling very overwhelmed to wondering if I really am pregnant.
I had no idea how Scott would react when I told him; I only knew I was freaking out when I saw that test come up positive. OK, make that 6 tests! To my surprise, he didn't flip out at all! I have never met a more even-kealed person in my life. His response? "Well, we knew we both wanted to be together. This will just speed things up a little bit." He seemed to have no question about how to move forward. He is very calming and instantly (well maybe not instantly) made me feel safe.
On Thursday 6/4, I went to see Dr. Grossman, who was recommended to me by Susan Chung. I'm not sure I like him. He was very dry and glib and I kind of felt like he marginalized my moment. He pretty much said, "OK, so I guess you probably looked up your due date on the Internet and ok, here's the picture of your kid." Um, ok. Thanks. He was more interested in my lacrosse career than anything else. I know he sees this every single day a million times over, but he just doesn't seem very caring. Though he was really helpful in recommending hospitals in Atlanta and giving me suggestions on how to find doctors. I guess you can't have it all. I realistically don't have to see him anymore since I'll see his wife in July and then I'll see the dr. in Atlanta through to my delivery. I am going to try to get an appointment with the doctor that delivered Scott's other 2 kids.
I haven't really had any bad pregnancy symptoms...I guess I'm really lucky! So far I've had is really tender boobs. The seem to grow a cup size a day. I had some really bad gas up until about a week ago. I get headaches every now and then and for the first 4 weeks, I was absolutely exhausted! I get tired now, but I really think that's just from being lazy and not working out too much. I haven't had any morning sickness at all - I felt nauseous 1 or 2 times, but I just think that was from taking my vitamins on a near-empty stomach. Sometimes I get indigestion and heart burn. I haven't had any real food cravings, either. I think I have been using my pregnancy as an excuse to eat anything I want, which needs to stop. The only thing that really tastes gross to me is black olives. I really need to get a routine going at the gym. All the classes I like to do get my heart rate up way too high, so I'm going to have to be really disciplined by myself (oh, that works out so well). I have been a bit emotional, but I was already pretty emotional to begin with. I think I am just feeling really overwhelmed with everything on top of the pregnancy. All I can say is thank God for Scott!!
Where to start with Scott??? I couldn't have asked for a better man. It's funny, I look back on that Friday we left Dallas and I remember I had a gut feeling about him. Granted, I didn't quite thing I'd be pregnant, planning to move across the country, and trying to figure out where to fit in a quicky wedding between kids' birthdays and the start of college football, but I knew this would go somewhere good. Anyway. Scott has been so wonderful so far. He honestly is the yin to my yang. When I'm balling my eyes out, he knows exactly how to calm me down and make me feel better. I feel like I can tell him anything, which is such a switch. It's so wonderful to be able to tell him what's going on in my head, whether good or bad, and not have him get defensive. He listens to what I say (most of the time) and communicates really well. I never wanted to go through this alone and I really need a big hug sometimes, but he sure does everything he can to comfort me and meet my needs as best he can. I feel so special and loved! The man has so much going on with kids, work, the park, and he always still makes me feel like #1.
I worry a lot about his kids!! I wish I'd gotten to know them better before this happened, but clearly that wasn't God's plan. I hope my visit in July will be good. I hope they like me. Their well being is so important to me!! I know Scott has done such a wonderful job raising them and they seem so fabulous, but I am terrified this is all going to mess with their heads. They are going to spend 5 days with me and then I'll be there permenantly at the end of August. I'm wondering if I should talk to a counselor before-hand. Scott thinks I should just be myself and I'll be fine. I really need to focus on hanging out with them 1-on-1 while I'm there. Maybe Jordyn would want to go get a mani/pedi with me. I'm not sure about Matthew. Dinner? Maybe working on K'Nex with him...maybe that's more of a solo thing though. Maybe I'll stop stressing about it and hope it comes naturally.
It's been about 2 1/2 weeks since I found out I am pregnant, but it's felt like the longest 2 1/2 weeks ever! I go from feeling very overwhelmed to wondering if I really am pregnant.
I had no idea how Scott would react when I told him; I only knew I was freaking out when I saw that test come up positive. OK, make that 6 tests! To my surprise, he didn't flip out at all! I have never met a more even-kealed person in my life. His response? "Well, we knew we both wanted to be together. This will just speed things up a little bit." He seemed to have no question about how to move forward. He is very calming and instantly (well maybe not instantly) made me feel safe.
On Thursday 6/4, I went to see Dr. Grossman, who was recommended to me by Susan Chung. I'm not sure I like him. He was very dry and glib and I kind of felt like he marginalized my moment. He pretty much said, "OK, so I guess you probably looked up your due date on the Internet and ok, here's the picture of your kid." Um, ok. Thanks. He was more interested in my lacrosse career than anything else. I know he sees this every single day a million times over, but he just doesn't seem very caring. Though he was really helpful in recommending hospitals in Atlanta and giving me suggestions on how to find doctors. I guess you can't have it all. I realistically don't have to see him anymore since I'll see his wife in July and then I'll see the dr. in Atlanta through to my delivery. I am going to try to get an appointment with the doctor that delivered Scott's other 2 kids.
I haven't really had any bad pregnancy symptoms...I guess I'm really lucky! So far I've had is really tender boobs. The seem to grow a cup size a day. I had some really bad gas up until about a week ago. I get headaches every now and then and for the first 4 weeks, I was absolutely exhausted! I get tired now, but I really think that's just from being lazy and not working out too much. I haven't had any morning sickness at all - I felt nauseous 1 or 2 times, but I just think that was from taking my vitamins on a near-empty stomach. Sometimes I get indigestion and heart burn. I haven't had any real food cravings, either. I think I have been using my pregnancy as an excuse to eat anything I want, which needs to stop. The only thing that really tastes gross to me is black olives. I really need to get a routine going at the gym. All the classes I like to do get my heart rate up way too high, so I'm going to have to be really disciplined by myself (oh, that works out so well). I have been a bit emotional, but I was already pretty emotional to begin with. I think I am just feeling really overwhelmed with everything on top of the pregnancy. All I can say is thank God for Scott!!
Where to start with Scott??? I couldn't have asked for a better man. It's funny, I look back on that Friday we left Dallas and I remember I had a gut feeling about him. Granted, I didn't quite thing I'd be pregnant, planning to move across the country, and trying to figure out where to fit in a quicky wedding between kids' birthdays and the start of college football, but I knew this would go somewhere good. Anyway. Scott has been so wonderful so far. He honestly is the yin to my yang. When I'm balling my eyes out, he knows exactly how to calm me down and make me feel better. I feel like I can tell him anything, which is such a switch. It's so wonderful to be able to tell him what's going on in my head, whether good or bad, and not have him get defensive. He listens to what I say (most of the time) and communicates really well. I never wanted to go through this alone and I really need a big hug sometimes, but he sure does everything he can to comfort me and meet my needs as best he can. I feel so special and loved! The man has so much going on with kids, work, the park, and he always still makes me feel like #1.
I worry a lot about his kids!! I wish I'd gotten to know them better before this happened, but clearly that wasn't God's plan. I hope my visit in July will be good. I hope they like me. Their well being is so important to me!! I know Scott has done such a wonderful job raising them and they seem so fabulous, but I am terrified this is all going to mess with their heads. They are going to spend 5 days with me and then I'll be there permenantly at the end of August. I'm wondering if I should talk to a counselor before-hand. Scott thinks I should just be myself and I'll be fine. I really need to focus on hanging out with them 1-on-1 while I'm there. Maybe Jordyn would want to go get a mani/pedi with me. I'm not sure about Matthew. Dinner? Maybe working on K'Nex with him...maybe that's more of a solo thing though. Maybe I'll stop stressing about it and hope it comes naturally.
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